Thursday, October 6, 2011

All the evils of humanity...in a bracelet

What is it with this Pandora jewelry?

You've heard of wacky performance art, right? Like, an empty room with the lights on, and occasionally somebody runs through it. Maybe they're naked. That's art.

It's a joke. It's some pseudo-intellectual snob, who thinks he's a great artist, pulling a fast one on what he deems a stupid and gullible audience.

That's Pandora.

The image of Pandora is a bracelet of garish baubles. It's on billboards and television commercials--praised as if it's the most beautiful piece of jewelry one could imagine. But what it is, is ugly as all get out. And expensive like crazy. I looked up one charm for this bracelet. Even though it had a cat on it, it was still ugly. And they wanted $50 for it. One charm!

They named it right, though. Pandora, as the story goes, opened a jar and released into the world all the evils we're stuck with today. Certainly an ugly, overpriced bracelet embodies that vision. It's like a sick joke. It's like a trick.

Their website tab says: Genuine jewelry--Pandora.

What does it take for jewelry to be genuine? Nothing. Put a string around your wrist and you've got genuine jewelry. I'm telling you, this is somebody's idea of a joke.

It's like that study someone did on 60 Minutes or some show like that (I think it was John Stossel) where they put some really cheap olive oil on display in the grocery store and tried to sell it for a ridiculously high price. They had ringers stand there and talk about what a great deal it was and people bought it!

Enter Pandora with its commercials about how much you really want that ugly bracelet and how much your husband loves you and knows your good taste when he buys it for you. And women fall for it.

1 comment:

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