Thursday, October 13, 2011

Birkin: Even the name is stupid*

I guess it's fashion week on The Sunshine State.

The other night I stayed up to catch Fashion Hunters after watching Mad Fashion. I just love Chris March. Anyway, the Fashion Hunters preview intrigued me because they showed a clip that led me to believe someone was trying to consign some stolen goods. Unfortunately, it would seem, that will be on next week's show.

In last night's episode, however, we were treated to display of disgusting excess involving something known as a Birkin. This was my first experience with Birkins, because I don't watch celebrities, or care about "fashion," or watch television shows about rich people, I guess.

For someone like me, watching snobby women pay five to ten thousand dollars for a used purse is like watching Dumb and Dumber. It's funny in parts, but mostly stupid and gross.

New Birkins cost at least $9,000 and Hermes "justifies" that expense by pointing to the fact that the bags are handmade...from really cool skins of various dead animals. And they're really, really hard to find.

I hate to break it to Hermes, but dead animal skin and hand stitches still do not warrant a selling price of over $16,000. (And they even dare to sell a canvas tote for more than $300.)

This is not justified. It can't be justified. It's just about status and demand and human stupidity.

On the show, the consignment shop owner held a Birkin party where ladies brought their Birkin bags to trade or sell. One lady showed up carrying a Birkin bag over her shoulder with a dog inside it! Luckily, that Birkin turned out to be a fake. Whew. Of course, even if she knew it was a fake when she bought it, she's carrying her dog around in a bag she paid thousands of dollars for.

But when she later purchased an old, worn, tacky, "heirloom" Birkin for $9,500, they all laughed and made her put her dog in it to see if it fit. You almost feel sorry for them.

*No insult to Jane Birkin intended, of course. What works for a person doesn't necessarily translate onto a product.

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